Suffer for beauty?

When I was 9 years old and got my ears pierced, I was crying of pain. My mom said coldly to me that women must suffer for their beauty; that didn’t really comfort me then.

And that doesn’t comfort me now, either. Today I got my toe operated so that I can wear high heels without discomfort, but I found out that God has started his evil plan with painful punishments for my unethical behaviour. First the nurse tried to pump the blood out of my leg to avoid excess bleeding, but the meter wasn’t working so the she kept pumping until I felt my leg will explode. I screamed of pain, and the nurse tried to unpump the pressure out again. The bloody machine didn’t work so in panic she had to tear off the wire. Good try God, but I survived.

But God didn’t give up. Somehow I wasn’t given enough anaesthesia to start with, so when the orthopaedic surgeon started cutting my toe, I could not only hear and see the assault, but also feel it. Instead of getting immediate heart stop, I both screamed and cried, and eventually they shot some more anaesthesia drug in my toe. I survived again.
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The rest of the operation I couldn’t feel a thing, but I felt extreme psychological discomfort when the surgeon took the drill and started boring in my toe. I turned on my MP3 at maximum but the awful noise from the drill couldn’t be beaten by Florent’s singing.

Now I am beginning to feel my toe again. I wish I couldn’t. I got a huge bag of painkillers to take home with, including morphine for extreme pain. I think this is extreme pain. I start with the morphine, all of them at once. After that I will take all the other pills and empty our liquor stock. This time I might not survive.