When the great Spanish dancer Luis saw me doing the splits from a hop, he told me how dangerous it is without first warming up. “Hey, danger is my middle name, just f… help me up!” I answered. Yes, this line was mine; Leslie Nielsen stole it and used it at Naked gun 33 1/3 without my permission.Well, Danger isn’t definitely my middle name anymore. The most dangerous thing I do these days is asking once a month for a salary raise from my boss. Then she calmly drinks up her coffee and hits me on the head with the empty coffee cup. But even this isn’t that dangerous anymore, now I am wearing a helmet when I walk over to her desk.
My middle name nowadays is most probably Inferiority complex. Everybody else is smarter, more beautiful, richer, skinnier and more successful. I better see a shrink. Or a plastic surgeon.
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